I Never Do This

This year I decided our family (at least the kids and I) are going to get more involved in the Autism community and awareness.
I've been sitting in the wings for a little too long.
Admiring and advocating the work that is done.
But not putting any real effort in myself.

Our first endeavor is going to be the Walk Now for Autism event being held on November 14th.

I am not one who easily asks for help.

If at all possible, I will get something accomplished by myself simply because ... I guess I hate the humility that comes with admitting that you just can't do it alone.

I also hate the possibility of rejection.

That I think hurts more than getting to the point of being able to ask for help.

For Brogan. For The Cause, I've swallowed my pride and bucked up against the possibility of having no financial support and sent out hundreds of emails.

Hundreds.

If I know you, if I can find your email ...

I've sent you an email asking for your support.

Cause this is something I believe in.

I don't believe so much that there is a "cure", but I surely believe there is a world of help out there that can be given if enough attention is brought to our cause.

So come on, people - let's make some money and make a difference!

Brogan's counting on you! (haha, just had to throw out the "tugging on the heart strings" line)

Disgruntled.

This word sums up how I am feeling about what is happening with Brogan's school year thus far.
I am so tired of hearing from his teacher about how she "just doesn't know" what to do with him.
SERIOUSLY?!?!?
Are you, or are you not suppose to be the professional in this situation?
Do you or do you not have all the resources you could possibly need at your finger tips (internet) or just down the hall (the districts Autism specialist)?
Are you too lazy to put in a little bit of work?
Last time I checked you were the special education teacher.
This is your frickin job.
WHY oh WHY am I the one doing YOUR JOB?!?!

Now that I have vented somewhat, I'll give you the back story.
I have expected Brogan to get a little bit more rowdy as he gets comfortable in his routine, with the teachers and with his peers.
This is just Brogan.
He's a little bit excitable and high spirited.
Not a bad thing, when you direct it towards creative endeavors.
Can be slightly frustrating if you let it get out of hand and have to deal with it over and over and over again.

His teacher who seems to be a very sweet lady has begun to have continual complaints about Brogan:

"We're getting so tired of having to tell him to stop hitting we're going to just make up signs and point to them when he gets out of hand."
"We tell him all the rules before he goes out to recess, but then he picks something else that we didn't cover and starts doing that."
"He doesn't respond to the color code, he starts laughing when we change his color!"

Ooooooh k.

Last week it escalated out of control.

He started choking kids.
Kicking.
Throwing things at them - hard.
Sucker punched a kid. On purpose.

After two days of him "going to red" (the third color down on the "behaviour" chart) he woke up and informed me that he wasn't feeling good and he was staying home from school.
I asked him if his head hurt? No. Stomach feel bad? No. Checked him for a fever. Negative.
My son who prior to this year loved school. I had to make him stay home when he actually WAS sick. Any bells going off in anyone else's head?
I sat down with his teacher and she told me about the times he was acting out ... and still I wasn't making the connections. I felt very frustrated and panicked. I didn't know how to help my son. If they were following the same guide lines his teacher had set up for him last year - what had changed so much that THIS was who my son is now?
What was going on that he didn't know how to handle it and was lashing out?
Who was falling down on the job?
Was it me?
What could be done!?!

I contacted our dear, much loved Kimberly and told her about what was going on. Expressed my frustration and fears.

Her answers were simple.
Basic.
Uncomplicated.

Is he being over stimulated?
Does he know he can take a time out?
Are they reminding him of the rules before he goes into high activity areas?
Are the other kids aware that Brogan needs his space?
How much supervision is really being provided?

It's not that I forget that Brogan is Autistic ... I just take it for granted that people in positions of authority and education in his life are also VERY aware of this and take that into consideration when placing him in situations.

So I stopped "doing" so much around the school and started "watching".

Oh.
My.
Heck.

I don't even know where to start.

They are essentially treating him like any other student, who misbehaves. No visuals. No breaks. No breathers. Extra supervision only in the classroom - where he doesn't need it anyway!

His A.R.D. (Admission, Review, and Dismissal) was (legally) to be tomorrow, but the school diagnostician ... oh, at this point WHO KNOWS?!?! All I know is I have a legal pad full of notes that I will be taking into this meeting.

Heads will begin to roll.

Things will change or I am going to be one pissy mom.